It seemed like such a good idea. Looking back, the combination of my three kids, 7-foot tall cornstalks, and a hot afternoon should have been indicators that this would not go so well. Keith and I ignored the indicators. We threw Molly up on Keith’s shoulders, named David and Emily our fearless leaders, and walked into the giant corn maze. It was hot. David and Emily led us. Did I mention the corn was tall?
Things went badly.
First, I entertained myself by making the kids pose in ways that I found funny. “Hey, kids! Pretend you’re both leading us in different directions! It’ll be awesome!”
“Mom, no we want to find our way out.”
“Do it. Now. It’s funny.”
After a while, it started to seem that we were actually lost in the maze.
“Hey, Keith, are we actually lost?”
“Yes, Amy. It’s a maze.”
“Yeah, but really?”
I then began to entertain myself with “Amy” comments which are known to embarrass the kids in public because they’re corny. (Ha! Corny! Couldn’t resist …):
Me: “Hey kids, I think it’s time to make shelter and order a pizza. Haha. ‘Hello, I’d like a delivery to the sound of my voice in the corn maze!’”
Then, just about the time I considered calling 911 (I can relate!), we found our way out. It was the longest 30-40 minutes of my life.
Or so I thought.
Until we entered the pumpkin patch realm of fall fun. It made the maze look like a bowl of popcorn.
All I wanted was one picture of all three kids happily posing amongst the pumpkins. It went like this:
Emily intentionally leaned on David. Her purpose was both a beautiful pose and to annoy her brother. She succeeded. He responded with a sister-shaking jerk and what could be viewed as an elbow to the aforementioned sister.
Emily was fake outraged.
So we tried again. This time I was ready. Thanks to my split-second timing, it could appear that Emily is sweetly smiling at her big brother. She’s not. She’s planning on leaning on him again because it worked so well the first time. But, I got my shot. Or the best I could hope for unless I try this picture with three different children.
What are your favorite fall traditions? Do you have any children to lend me for my Christmas photos?